When I’m with other girls, I think about you.
I compare you to them, and I’m disappointed with the results.
I wonder why they can’t be like you?
Why they can’t put my mind at ease like you can?
Why they can’t hold me like you can?
Why they can’t kiss me like you can?
Why is it so hard with them, but it was easy with you?
I know that we didn’t fall in love, but we were close.
I remember that night in your room where love was patiently waiting for us.
I knew that if we took things further that night, love would be certain in our relationship.
You were all over me, and your kisses were different.
They wanted something more from me.
They wanted every part of my body, and they were hard to resist.
The taste of your lips was irresistible to me.
I couldn’t stop sucking and licking them.
They were just like candy.
So sweet and so delicious.
They knew how to treat me right.
Why can’t other lips be like your lips?
We almost make love a reality, but I push you away at the last minute.
You understand, but you’re hurt.
How could I not give love a chance with you?
Sadly, I was bound to the fears and rules that shaped me.
God was so proud of me, but I was disappointed in myself.
I try to tell you that you did nothing wrong, but you don’t believe me.
Instead, you want me to leave.
I do as you wish and leave you alone.
How could I be so foolish with you?
How could I not take things further with you?
How could I not allow myself to fall in love with you?
I know I was young, but I could’ve done better.
That night with you always haunts me because you could’ve been the first girl I ever loved.
I fear that you were the one that was supposed to be my everything.
I fear that you were my one chance at love.
I fear that you will always be a nightmare.
I fear that no one will ever be like you.