I Chose What I Knew

I miss you today,
Not in the way love demands,
But in the quiet ways that linger.
I miss our conversations,
The laughter that came easily,
The adventures that felt simple.
But more than anything,
I miss the friendship we once held,
And I wish it could still live here.

I remember the day you told me you loved me.
I didn’t know what to say.
It surprised me,
Not because it wasn’t sincere,
It was because my heart didn’t know how to meet yours there.

So I told you I had love for you too,
Trying to be careful with my words,
Making it clear that I’m talking about friendship,
Hoping that would be enough.
Then I tried to move forward
As if nothing had changed,
Pretending the moment hadn’t shifted us.
I knew it wasn’t fair,
But I was trying to protect us,
And what we already had.

You grew bolder with your hope.
You asked me, quietly and then clearly,
To imagine more with you.
And I chose not to see the signs,
Not because I didn’t value you,
But because I valued the safety of what we were.

I couldn’t envision love with you.
I couldn’t force a feeling
That wasn’t growing inside me.
And you deserved someone who was certain about you.
Someone who could choose love without hesitation.

I was content being your friend.
I was grateful for where we stood.
But you asked me to take a leap of faith,
And I chose something else,
I didn’t choose fear,
But I chose honesty.
I placed my faith in truth over desire,
In clarity over confusion.
We weren’t meant to walk the same path forward,
And I finally learned to accept that.

So yes, I miss you today.
I miss the time, the closeness, the ease we once had,
But I don’t regret the choice I made.

You walked away because friendship wasn’t enough for you,
And I respect that.
But friendship was enough for me.
It was safe.
It was genuine.
It meant everything in the way I knew how to give.

I didn’t choose love,
Not because I lacked it,
But because I didn’t understand it back then.I chose what I knew.
And today,
I’m grateful for what we were,
Even if we couldn’t become more.