Late Night Call

I remember the first and only time I heard your voice on the phone.

It was late at night,

And I was relaxing in bed.

You called me,

And I eagerly answered.

I was excited to hear your soothing, gentle voice

On a quiet, sleepless night.

It was warm and calming

Like a campfire on a beach.

Your voice put me in a dream-like, relaxing place.

A place that I really can’t describe.

A place that I never wanted to leave.

I remember wanting to learn everything about you.

I was intrigued and eager to learn.

I didn’t want you to hold anything back.

Thankfully, you didn’t disappoint me.

You told me about your dream of being a housewife.

Your desire to be more spiritual and closer to God.

Your obsession over a specific actor and his movies.

Your fears and worries,

You told me these things and many more without hesitation.

I admired you for that.

You were so open and honest with me.

You were real and authentic.

But most importantly,

You were not afraid to share yourself with me.

I was afraid to share myself with you that night.

I couldn’t share all of me with you.

There were reasons holding me back from doing such a thing.

Reasons that I couldn’t really ignore,

Despite you giving me such a sweet dream.

Reasons were telling me to wait.

Reasons were telling me to stay back,

When I wanted to get closer to you.

I wanted to open myself up to you.

I wanted to trust you so much that night,

But reasons wouldn’t allow it.

They refused to allow it.

How could they be so unfair to you?

Our late night call had a time limit,

And it was coming to an end.

It was late at night,

And we both had work in the morning.

We needed to end our call.

I didn’t want to say goodbye to you.

I didn’t want to wake up to reality.

I wanted to stay with you in this pleasant dream,

But I remember dreams don’t last forever.

They’re temporary,

And they end in an instant with or without your approval.

They may also never come back to you again,

Just like our first and only late night call.

Far, Far Away

I wonder about our future together,

I wonder if we’re meant to last forever,

I wonder to avoid the harsh reality,

I slip down the rabbit hole,

And I know I shouldn’t get lost like Alice in Wonderland

But I can’t help it,

Wondering is just another way of avoiding.

I should just talk to you

And tell you how I feel,

But I can’t do such a thing,

I’m too afraid to do such a trivial thing,

Yet I act like I’m so big, bold and strong

When I’m a really a cowardly lion in Oz.

There’s no place like you,

Yet I want to be in a world of pure imagination,

A place like Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory

Full of sweets and all my desires,

Can that really be a better paradise than you?

There’s no way of knowing without going,

Yet I don’t want to be far from you,

I don’t want to be far from home,

But it’s too late,

I’m already far, far away.

Letting You Go

I thought that it would be impossible to let you go.

It’s a miracle that I was able to do so.

You always had me itching and wanting your attention and love.

You were medicine for me.

It’s a fact,

I can’t lie about that.

You were a drug that gave me a special kind of high,

Yet you were also a drug that was detrimental to my mind, body and soul.

You were a goddess in my eyes.

I worshipped you without hesitation.

I believed in you with determination,

When I should’ve known that you were a false idol.

I never had a chance,

I was lost in your trance.

I was hypnotized by your physical beauty.

I fantasized about you,

When I knew that I should’ve kept my distance.

But you would not allow it.

You depended on me.

You told me I was a comfort for you.

You told me I was reassurance for you.

You told me I was an angel to you.

You told me I was the sweetest and kindest to you.

You told me I was somebody that you could count on.

You told me I was so much for you,

Yet you were so little for me.

You were never going to let me go.

You intended to keep me as your prisoner,

But I longed for freedom.

It was tiring and exhausting to be with you.

I had to give you so much,

And you were content in giving me so little.

That was never going to change.

You envisioned a future with me.

You had these big plans and dreams for us,

But they were not meant to be.

Disappointments, heartache and hurt was our future.

You tried to tell me that things would get better between us.

You tried to tell me that you were going to change.

At that point,

I knew that they were just mere words.

I could finally tell.

You did not mean any of those words you spoke to me.

They were just lies to keep me under your spell.

I had a chance at love with you,

But I knew that it was not going to be real love.

It would have been an illusion with you.

I even had this delusion that you loved me in your own way.

Maybe I just needed to take a chance with you

And hope you would change in time.

Sadly, I could not trust in chance and hope.

I had to trust the evidence.

I had to let you go.

Dream Girls: Part One

I’m in a strange place right now.

I’m laying down, and I can’t move.

I’m not scared, but I long for answers.

I’m in a place of hurt and pain,

Yet my surroundings are the exact opposite.

I look around, and I’m surrounded by black sand.

I look up and the sky is red with pink clouds,

And the sun looks like a big, white light bulb.

It’s bright and intense.

I can hear waves crashing rocks and the black sand.

I naturally assume that I’m on a beach.

 

My vision starts to blur, and I can’t hear the waves anymore.

I can only hear the sound of my heart beat.

Beating faster and faster.

The pain in my chest has intensified,

My throat is swelling up,

Breathing is a struggle,

Death is coming soon.

I know it, but I’m not afraid.

I’m relieved.

Dying on a strange, yet beautiful beach doesn’t sound too bad.

It’s a luxury that not a lot of people have.

Some die in the darkest of places,

Others just die normally in regular places.

We just never know how death will take us.

 

As I have accepted my fate, a woman appears above me.

She kneels down to my level,

And gently touches my face.

There’s something sweet and familiar about her gentle touch.

I wish I could see her clearly.

Her face gets closer to my face.

Our eyes meet, and I think I know who she is.

But I’m not sure.

Our lips are inches away from each other,

She decides to seal them with a kiss.

 

I immediately remember who she is.

She’s the one that got away.

She’s the one that I miss every single day.

She’s the one that had lips like candy.

There’s no one like her.

No one that will ever be like her.

 

After our shared kiss, she gets back up.

She grabs my feet and drags me to the ocean.

I don’t resist.

Once she has me in the ocean, she disappears.

I search for her, but she’s long gone.

The black-sanded beach is nowhere to be found either.

 

I find myself just surrounded by the purple ocean.

I chuckle as I fully submerge myself into the purple ocean.

As I am slowly drowning,

I welcome the calmness of the purple ocean.

I listen to the quietness of the purple ocean.

I can no longer feel the intensity of the sun,

The purple ocean is all I feel now.

The sun fades away from my memory,

Everything turns black.

 

I wake up from a strange dream,

I can’t help but remember.

My mind doesn’t think about the sweet purple ocean,

It doesn’t think about the pure black-sanded beach,

It doesn’t think about the majestic red sky,

Or even the intense white sun,

It only thinks about her.

For she is now a dream girl.

 

This is the end of part one of the Dream Girls series. Be sure to like, share and comment your thoughts on this poem!

I will be posting and sharing part two of “Dream Girls” on Sunday!

 

 

 

 

 

The Death of You

It’s frightening that I have murder on my mind.

I have to remind myself that I’m justified in killing you.

Please understand that I don’t want to do this.

Killing you is my worst nightmare.

I’ve always loved you and everything you’ve done for me.

You’re the reason for my Shawshank Redemption.

You’re the reason for my motivation to fight.

You’re the reason for my dedication to life.

Nevertheless, I have to end you.

 

I rely on you way too much.

You have failed me countless times.

You’re an ally that I can no longer afford to have by my side.

We’ve lost too many battles together in this great war called life.

The enemy is destroying us at will from all angles, yet you tell me to be patient.

You tell me to stay optimistic for help will be on the way.

You tell me to trust in you, and I trust in you.

 

Years later, we’re still losing the battles that you said we could win.

And you’re still telling me the same things.

How long can I continue this never ending cycle of losing?

How long must I show goodness and mercy to all of my enemies?

How long can I tolerate you?

 

I’m sorry that it had to come to this.

I never expected this day to come.

I thought that we would always be together.

I thought that you would always be my strength.

I thought that you would always be the one to comfort me.

I thought, and I was wrong.

 

The thought of killing you is madness.

I don’t want to lose you.

I didn’t think I could ever lose you.

Like dreams, nightmares do come true, too.

At the same time, circumstances have changed.

Killing you is a necessary evil.

 

I’m sorry that I have to do this.

I’m sorry that I have to betray you.

I’m sorry that I have to abandon you.

I’m sorry that I have to crucify you.

I’m sorry that I have to murder you.

Please, forgive me.

Please forgive me for the death of you.

 

 

 

 

 

Pure Imagination, I Wish

This room? Although it was a small, cramped room,
You always managed to make it big and wondrous
Like Wonderland for time was all messed up,
Time had gone mad and jazz was the only thing that made sense.

I remember all the unnecessary papers
Stacked and spread around like skyscrapers in a city,
There was no room to explore this confined, yet marvelous city
That you designed.

As the sound of your saxophone went wild in this world,
I found myself in paradise.
As a young boy, I was exposed to a world of pure imagination,
I was lost, but I was not afraid.

A few years passed, a new sound entered this universe,
It was the sound of percussion.
I thought the loud drums didn’t belong,
It couldn’t compare to your loving saxophone.

When I became a young man, the drums and saxophone were in-sync,
And we were the kings,
Our empire was glorious as we ruled it together,
Sadly, kingdoms don’t last forever.

You got older and forgot this world,
It wasn’t your fault, it was a cruel disease that murdered your sweet mind
A mind that shared love, wisdom and strength to me,
Reduced to confusion and terror.

I wish those days together with you would come back once more,
I wish this room was more than a room again,
I wish we could create sweet music together once more,
Why did those days ever have to go?

This is the end of the poem.

This poem is dedicated to my late Grandpa Jerry. His birthday was on Friday, and I was debating if I really wanted to share this poem that’s personal to me. However, the untimely death of NBA legend Kobe Bryant changed my mind because this is a poem about cherishing the moments and times that we have with our loved ones and to live a life of love and happiness. We can’t press the rewind button on life, and we have to treat every day as if it was our last day on this earth. I had great, loving moments with my grandpa that I’ll never forget. I cherish all the days that we had together because they helped shape who I am. My grandpa showed me the strength of faith, the beauty of writing, the magic of music and so much more. I love my grandpa so much, and I just wish those days with him would come back once.